3 Shocking Facts Men Need You To Know About Them

Hello favourite readers! Here is this listicle to ladies who like me have been in relationships or are in one but have no clue. I’m totally here for you, because I know exactly what it means to be with someone you love so dearly and yet get hurt.

I originally named this post ” 5 Surprising facts you didn’t know abut the man you love”.Two things, I don’t know what my obsession with 5 is, and I don’t want to bore you with 5 facts! Oh Lol.

In school then, we would scribble mathematical formulas in our palms or cram them just so we didn’t forget because in maths, it doesn’t matter how intelligent or good you are if you don’t know the formula to apply. This also applies to relationships, you need to know what works and what doesn’t work, yeah I know some people would say they don’t do rules, they like to be themselves, but a great relationship is the result of two dedicated individuals working hard at making it work. Here below are some interesting facts you can easily remember about the man in your life. If your relationship is awkward already, it’s not late to get in line with these tips.

  • He wants your respect

A Survey ran on 400 men by Shaunti Feldhahn got me astonished and gave me a clearer understanding of the difference between both sexes. The research asked men to pick between two options: “to be alone and unloved in the world” or “to feel inadequate and disrespected by everyone”. 73.8% of men said they’ll rather be alone and unloved in the world than take disrespect.

Another instance where the male need for respect hit me was in the movie “Fireproof” Caleb Holt (Kirk Cameron), in a conversation with his father made this statement; “seems like I am a hero to everyone in the world except my wife”. Men want respect, Women want love. Respect is not saying tremble at his feet and call him “my lord”, it’s in little things like appreciating him, asking for his help and  publicly respecting him.


  • When he pulls back, it’s not you!!

From our understanding about ourselves, it is safe to say that women reward people with words and time, so if I’m talking to you, I like you and if I don’t, aint no way I’m talking to you, however, guys don’t operate this way, their withdrawal is born from a different source. Dr. John Gray, in his Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus gives insight on this that is relatable:

“At such times, he becomes increasingly distant, forgetful, unresponsive, and preoccupied in his relationships and he is incapable of giving a woman the attention and feeling that she normally receives and certainly deserves. His mind is preoccupied, and he is powerless to release it. If, however, he can find a solution, instantly he will feel much better and come out of his cave; suddenly he is available for being in a relationship again.”

Dr. John advises us to not try to  have intimate conversations with him when he is in his ‘cave’ but to talk about problems with friends or have fun and go shopping. Who knows, he might snap out of it faster.

Watch out for the last shocker next week.




Why We Need to Fill Gaps

Hey guys, I’m sorry that I’ve been MIA for a while, I had to be silent because God was helping me deal with some deep rooted issues (He ain’t done yet, but I’ma start talking already).

A gap is a break in connection between two points that were initially meant to be connected. In elementary school, we were given class exercises where incomplete sentences would be given and we had to fill the blanks in those sentences if we were ever going to make any sense out of them. Something as simple as a sentence missing a word can destroy the information that sentence was supposed to pass when it was made. But is it not so in the world today, we have relationship gaps, unemployment gaps, money gaps and many other gaps we either don’t recognize or have chosen to not speak about.

God intended a purpose for every individual and some of us might go through tough experiences to fulfill that purpose. The challenge is that most of us survive those experiences and enjoy staying in the victory without realizing that we need to go out there and fill gaps….

Imagine if every person that has survived pain and hurt started to help others that were going through pain, or if every person that has scaled poverty started giving empowering sessions and help to those in poverty. Imagine if we began to ask God what gaps we can fill everyday through the experiences we go through. That instead of spreading the gap through hate, jealousy, slander, gossip and strife, we would begin to fill gaps. When you stand in for someone, you’re filling a gap, when you pray for Houston, Mexico and areas affected by hurricane Irma, you are filling a gap, when you give to someone in need, you are filling a gap, when you choose love instead of hate, you are building a bridge-filling a gap.

I have started to ask God to show me what gaps to fill and to help me make adjustments to my behavior as He leads me.


My Breakdown Story

Today, I had a mini-breakdown, I began to doubt that God truly loves me. In my head, if He loves me, He should answer my prayers, He should hear me out. I have a list of about 5 things right now that I’ve been praying to God for since March and I’m really feeling the pressure from outside for those needs to be met, but I’ve not seen any positive response yet.

I’ve cried, prayed, spoken the word and believed and nothing really changed. Sometimes (ooops, many times) I tell God that I’m angry at Him and that I will never pray to Him again because He doesn’t hear me.

During the time I was crying today because of what I wanted God to do that had not been done, I began to remember all the other things that I had prayed for that are still pending and I got angrier at God. At a point, I began to tell God that it was hard but I still wanted His love to cover me. So I was trying to wipe my tears and praying to God to help me.

It was a crazy moment for me and for a second, I felt I couldn’t trust God anymore, and as much as I don’t understand, somehow the thing worked. I’ve been praying for Him to root me in His love and I guess I’m in the process. All thanks to God!

 Be careful—watch out for attacks from Satan, your great enemy. He prowls around like a hungry, roaring lion, looking for some victim to tear apart. Stand firm when he attacks. Trust the Lord; and remember that other Christians all around the world are going through these sufferings too. 1 Peter 5:8-9 (TLB)

In The Valley of Pain (pt3)

God loves us, we’ve heard this and it’s beginning to sound like a broken gramophone record, if He really loves us, why would He let us go through the pain we feel sometimes. We cry out to Him to help us sort what we are going through out and it seems like an endless cycle because we still end up feeling horrible.

The pain might be break-up, friends not giving you the attention you deserve or general lack in your life. Does God allow us go through the pain so that we would be able to help those who go through them later on?

God really does love us and He sees what we go through, He allows us to cry and feel the pain so strongly and this has been the point of argument for most atheists – How can a God who claims to love us allow us go through pain? The truth is that I don’t know but one thing I know is that I have been through pain a lot of times in my life and so many times it has felt like God was not there, I called Him names and told Him I wasn’t going to trust Him ever again because I felt He just did not hear me. I used all the words in my vocabulary to try to get Him to say something but He was still quiet.

The total message here is that He loves us even in the pain, God does not let us go through the pain because He does not love us, His silence whispers His love. God is calling as many of us today that have reached the end of the plank and are ready to give up on trusting Him. He never fails, He has never failed and He certainly would not. Let Him work on your heart because HE IS MORE CONCERNED WITH THE STATE OF YOUR HEART THAN YOUR SITUATION. He will solve your situation, but let Him deal with your heart first.

Then, when that happens, we are able to hold our heads high no matter what happens and know that all is well, for we know how dearly God loves us, and we feel this warm love everywhere within us because God has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love. Rom 5:5 (The Living Bible)

In The Valley of Pain (Pt. 2)

What really happens when we pray? We say “God I want love, peace, money, healing, a job or friends, clarity”, but none of these prayers seem to get answered. Before my 21st birthday, I had a few things that I wanted God to do for me, I even asked God for a birthday gift and I received none (none that I can see at least). I’m thankful for the gift of life, that’s awesome and the gift of protection and provision. Back to my birthday story, I didn’t get to do all I planned because I was broke and not too happy.

What really happens to our prayers when the God that tells us to pray said that we should ask anything in Jesus name and we have it? People want the real stuff, the unadulterated stuff that works on a grumpy Monday, laid back Tuesday, crazy Wednesday, grey Thursday and a Terrific Friday. We want the foolproof stuff that gives guarantee for tomorrow.

How do we find these answers? are they in prayers, tears, praise or waiting? What’s the good stuff that keeps us healthy all the way? I think it’s personal, no one can tell you what it really is, for you, it might be just to have visible love, for some other, it’s solution to a lifelong problem and for others it’s to be rich and successful.

The question is (because we all are looking for answers, there has to be a question) what do you really need? What makes you so emotional, incomplete or helpless that if you found solution to today, every other part of your life will take significant adjustment?

When you find that thing, take time out to reflect, love and get that part of you healed up and defined because it sums up your life’s purpose most times. God’s love is real, healthy stuff, it’s not the junk that the world gives.

I will love to hear from you, share your stories with me by sending a mail to me through my contact me page or through my lprojectletters@gmail.com address.


I’ve had a good look at what God has given us to do—busywork, mostly. True, God made everything beautiful in itself and in its time—but he’s left us in the dark, so we can never know what God is up to, whether he’s coming or going. I’ve decided that there’s nothing better to do than go ahead and have a good time and get the most we can out of life. That’s it—eat, drink, and make the most of your job. It’s God’s gift. – Eccl 3: 9-13


In The Valley Of Pain

There are a thousand reasons to give up, especially when nothing is changing after you have been praying  and being a little bit steadfast in the word. Where is God when it all happens? is He hiding somewhere or is it that He just does not want to listen to us?

I’ve been through a lot of negativity most seasons of my life and I’ve caught myself wondering where God really is. I’ve been through loneliness, frustration, being picked on, criticized and gossiped about, but God’s word said that I am the light of the world, that I am royalty, that I am beautiful and loved. So why do I get slapped by negativity every passing day? is it that the word of God doesn’t apply to me or what exactly is it?

Is God really there when I’m in the valley of pain, or am I actually alone? these are real questions being asked by people going through stuff. Some have given up and don’t want to remember that they have a God because they have not seen Him come through every time they called. Could it be possible that He loves us in spite of His quietness.

God has not failed. He will not fail, he is compassionate and good. He is kind and loving and he does not forget those He loves. What to do in the pain is to keep seeking Him, keep crying when the tears come and keep hiding in his arms. Sometimes God calls us to a sober life, to live each day in pain so that we can be refined through the fire and come out as Gold.

God will comfort you when your pain is much, you don’t know the answers and that’s okay, remember, it’s okay to feel lonely, hurt, jealous, sad and hopeless. When we go as we are and acknowledge who we are before God, his healing work begins in those places.

If you’re feeling some kinda way now and you don’t know where else to turn to, turn to God and receive love from Him. Send me a message through my contact me page or lprojectletters@gmail.com and I will be sure to respond and pray for you. We need more love in this world that has been blinded by the lies of the enemy.


Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort,  who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.

My Silly Relationship Story: Orientation Camp Escapades

Hey guysss! How’s this weather treating Y’all? For me, I’ve been super hesitant to go to work. It’s been one hell of a week since last Tuesday, but God came through.

Today’s story is one that you can take a quick guess about from the caption, but before I start with this story, I’ll like to put a disclaimer here. These stories are totally past experiences that the writers have learnt from and they are solely posted for comedy and to help a sister that needs to know.

Story time

We met at NYSC (National Youth Service Corps) orientation camp, I honestly didn’t think anything would come up between us because he was the kind of guy that had so many girls flirting with him simply because he was cute! He was in my platoon so we got talking when we started practising for the volleyball competition. He was our coach and he was really nice to everyone. He knew just how to get the best out of you while playing. He would give compliments everyday and stare at me all through parade. I thought I was dreaming, this was the guy every girl was drooling over and he was all on my matter.

Trust me, I chose to ignore him because it was too good to be true, although I had a crush on him. One evening, during parade, I sat at the back because I had a problem with my breathing, he came and began to talk to me. We spoke for so long that I forgot to have dinner. We continued talking everyday after that and he would take me for lunch, dinner, you know that formal respectful kinda somethin.

Mr. smoothtalker was perfect and I had no reason to doubt him because he didn’t touch me or request for anything sexual. After a while, I began to hear stuff about him that he was dating bout five other girls on camp. I didn’t believe because I knew we spent all of our time together, so I waved it off. My friends warned me but I sincerely felt it was ‘bad belle’ talk. I trusted him so much so I told him what people were saying, he just smiled and said “don’t mind them”.

Some days later, I made a snap of the two of us (at this time, we were already an item, we had even shared a few kisses), one of my friends immediately messaged me and asked if that was (name withheld, let’s give him Mr. smoothtalker) smoothtalker. Shocked, I responded in the affirmative and asked her how she knew him. She called my phone immediately and downloaded the full gist for me. His girlfriend’s name, how the two were an item on instagram, she even gave me his IG name and I checked his page. So apparently, this guy had a girlfriend at home that he adored and he wanted to waste my time. SMH, I didn’t say anything to him, I just avoided him for the remaining time we had to stay in camp.

So, that’s my short story and I hope you enjoyed it? Thanks loveproject for the platform.

Till next post!

Please if you have a story please send me a mail through my contact me page and I will definitely get back to you. Thanks!